The sense of shame related to adoption

Question: In 2015, an American sociologist did a study comparing attitudes of women with unplanned pregnancies toward abortion and adoption (Results of the study were published in 2017 in the Journal Women’s Health Issues). She found that many women considered adoption to be a trauma, both for themselves and the child, who some women feared would grow up to resent them. She also found that neither the pro-choice nor pro-life factions, gave these women much counselling around adoption. There seems to be a lot of stigma around it. Why is this the case?


Answer from the Ascended Master Mother Mary through Kim Michaels. This answer was given during the 2020 Webinar – Choosing America’s Future.

There are several reasons for this. But the main reason that I will point out here is that there is this very old attitude, that goes very, very far back in many parts of the world, that as a parent, you either own your children or you are responsible for your children. You talk about my parents, my children, it’s almost a universal use of language around the world. But when you understand the reality, the spiritual reality, the reincarnation, you understand that every human being is an independent lifestream. You have lived many lifetimes. Your current parents have not been your parents in all those past lifetimes, they may have been in a few but certainly not all of them. You recognize here that it is meaningless to say that these are my parents, or my children. You do not own other human beings.

There may be some cases where you have severe karma with people from past lives and that gives you a bond that makes you feel a sense of ownership of these people. But in reality, you do not own other people. This also means that karma can outplay itself in many different ways. There are people who want to maintain a certain traditional view of the family. That a family is the basic unit of society that is somehow sacred that it should be maintained in a certain way, and that you should be very obedient and attached to your parents and that parents have responsibility for their children and so on. These are what you might call traditional values, but in the golden age, they will naturally shift as they have already started shifting in many parts of the world.

You need to come to this point where you realize that it is very possible to have a karmic responsibility to a certain livestream. And you can fulfill that responsibility by giving birth to the livestream and giving your child up for adoption. It doesn’t mean you necessarily have to raise the child yourself.

What I’m basically saying in here is that there are many, many people who have a negative view of adoption because of these projections from this − even a collective beast that wants to maintain a traditional family structure and family values. It is considered by these many cultures that it is wrong to give up a child for adoption, it is running away from your responsibility, it makes you a bad person, or a bad mother, or a bad woman, or whatever. And these are traumas that very much need to be overcome in a modern society.

It is very true that neither the pro-life nor the pro-choice factions in the United States are doing much to help women with this. And there is this great need that someone else could take up. You cannot expect the pro-life or the pro- choice to do it, because they are too polarized. But some neutral organization aimed at helping women could certainly take up this cause and give women more counseling, and help change the attitudes of women and the attitude of society to adoption.

It is of course true that many children who have been adopted come to a point in their adult lives where they are told that they were adopted. And sometimes they have certain feelings about this that are not entirely positive. They might feel: “Why did my real mother not want me?” for example. But this is again, a cultural thing that will gradually fade away in the golden age. It will be there for some time. But again, as a woman, you do not have to be bound by this. You can recognize that you have a right to make the choice to carry a pregnancy to term and give up the child for adoption, rather than having an abortion.

You will see that there is a peculiar phenomenon in the pro-life and pro-choice movements, in that both of them are in a way perpetuating this sense of shame related to adoption. The pro-choice movement wants the woman to have an abortion and does not want to give her the freedom to choose an adoption. And the pro-life movement wants the woman to have a child and raise it and does not want to give it up for adoption. These are not views that are in alignment with the spiritual reality and the ascended masters or the golden age ideas.

 

Copyright © 2020 Kim Michaels