Interactions with the family members as an opportunity to gauge own progress

Question: Saint Germain spoke about our public discourse over politics. In my family we can’t discuss politics because some of our views differ so much between members. Can the masters give me an example of how we could come together? Issues that come to mind are healthcare and gun control.

Answer from the Ascended Master Mother Mary through Kim Michaels. This answer was given at a conference in Albuquerque (USA) in  2018.

Well my beloved, Saint Germain has already given you some very important pointers and tools on how to do this on a general level. What I will focus on here is the situation of families. When you talk about a family that can’t discuss politics, the issue is not politics; the issue is karma that you have with your family members, probably going back several generations. You might say that politics is just the excuse for arguing and you’re arguing because you don’t like each other [laughter]. You resent the fact that you’ve been dumped together in this family unit and that you’ve been brought up in a situation where you feel you can’t just walk away from it because you have to be loyal to the family. You have to find a way; you have to at least be together with your family at these certain events during the year that have been labeled family events in your culture.

Instead of being honest with yourself and recognizing, I don’t like these people and I’m not gonna spend next Christmas with them and I’m not gonna go home for Thanksgiving – instead of doing this, you force yourself to go there. You might try to keep sort of a harmonious discourse by not speaking out, by not being yourself and then inevitably someone brings up the topic and then everybody explodes and now it’s just a free-for-all. How many times have you seen this? How many times have we seen this from the ascended octave?

What can you do about it? Well if you are an ascended master student, you can simply work on yourself, overcome your own psychology, the primal self, so that you don’t react to your family members. You can literally decide to do this. It helps you when you have resolved the things in yourself so that you don’t have this compulsion. This messenger has described what he did at an early age with his father when he simply saw that if the relationship continued on its current track there would come a point where they couldn’t speak to each other. So he said to himself, Do I want to be in that situation where I don’t have contact with my father? He decided: No, I don’t so then how can I find a way to have interaction with my father without arguing? Was it likely that his father would change? No, it wasn’t. So if the relationship was going to change, who would have to change? Well, he had to. He started by simply accepting his father for who he was, not trying to change him but not feeling obligated to let his father change him.

You can decide to do this with your family members – to not try to change them, to accept them for who they are. Then you can listen to them without feeling that you have to refute what they’re saying because you’re not threatened by it. You’re realizing that your family members’ political views are an expression of their state of consciousness and it’s not your job to change their state of consciousness. You just listen to them and you don’t oppose them. You don’t feed the antagonistic situation. When they try to provoke you, you don’t respond that way.

This in itself might be enough to change the discourse, the dynamic, in the family if just one person refuses to feed the beast, so to speak. You can of course, also make the calls for your family members but there’s always free will involved. Most likely your family members are not on the spiritual path, are not willing to work on their psychology. They don’t think they’re the ones who have to change; they think you are the one who has to change. You’re the problem; they’re not the problem. That’s karma. That’s a karmic situation.

The fact of the matter is that many of you spiritual people have volunteered to be in a family with people who are basically not self-aware. They are always projecting out that the problem is somewhere else. It is not them. They are never willing to look at themselves. You have volunteered to do this for two reasons. One is to give them an opportunity to see that there’s a different way to react but in order to give them that opportunity you, of course, have to not react. And how do you not react? Well, ultimately by resolving your own psychology. Why have you volunteered to embody in a family with people like this? It’s partly because they demonstrate very clearly what happens to people who are not working on themselves.

You have also done it in order to overcome what often puts you in a difficult situation with other people, namely, the belief that you have to change them, help them. That is what this messenger has also described, that he had the attitude before he came to earth for the first time that he had to alleviate the suffering on earth, help other people. Essentially it meant he had to change them, instead of allowing them to outplay their free will and just giving them an example that there was another way to live. He felt he had to go in and change their minds.

All of you who have it in your divine plan to make your ascension in this lifetime have to transcend the state of consciousness that you have to change other people. As long as you think you have to do that, you cannot leave the earth behind because you can’t leave those people behind.

As I said about telling your personal story, you can look at the interaction with your family members; look at next Thanksgiving, as an opportunity to gauge your own progress. Have you resolved your reactionary patterns or do you still find yourself reacting? If you do then use our tools to go down, discover that self and resolve that self. You keep doing this until you come to a point where you are no longer reacting to your family members. You are then free to make the choice and say to yourself, do I really want to spend my time and my attention with these people? But you are not choosing to leave them behind in order to run away from them or rather from your own reaction because you have resolved the reactionary self.

You might find that you will choose to still interact with them and just be at peace with the people they are, their level of awareness. So you talk about the things that they are interested in, you talk about the things that they can deal with, you listen to them, you allow them to rant about this or that without reacting to it and you can still find some enjoyment in interacting with them. You may also decide that you no longer want to interact with these people. You want to find some people who are at your level of consciousness, have your view of life and that’s perfectly in order as well. You see your family as an opportunity for your own growth and then you deal with yourself and your own psychology until there is no longer a reaction then you know you have resolved what you wanted to resolve by being born into that family.


Copyright © 2018 Kim Michaels