Question: I have understood that in order to transcend a certain legitimate desire in a balanced way, the natural scenario is to have actual enjoyment and move through the stages of refining it until one reaches saturation. Regarding sex, how can one do this in case one does not meet a partner that they resonate with and does not know if they will ever meet a partner as it also depends on the free will of others? How can sex be transcended in another way? In the Freedom from Ego Games book it says, you will not be ready to ascend until you reach the saturation point and feel you are done with sex. Please help me in this matter as I still feel I need a partner, but I also feel I have transcended masturbation and sex without mutual pure feelings.
Answer from the Ascended Master Mother Mary through Kim Michaels. This answer was given during the 2023 Kazakhstan Conference.
Well, you can take two approaches. You can take a practical approach where you say: “I need to have a certain amount of experiences with having physical sex before I can feel saturated with this.” This requires you then to find a partner who is willing or maybe even has the same need.
If you are practical, you can say: “Do I actually have a need for physical sex”? Then it does not necessarily mean I have to find a partner that I am deeply in love with or can have a lifelong love relationship with. It could be that I could engage in a responsible sexual activity with a person who has the same need. You may have to be more realistic about your expectations of a relationship in order to overcome the physical need.
But the other approach is to say: “I am not willing to engage in sex this way”. Which means then you must overcome the desire for sex without engaging in the physical activity. And this, of course, we have given various teachings on, that you can overcome a sensual physical desire without engaging in the actual physical activity. And why is this so? Because when you take our teachings that the earth is a reality simulator, you realize that the purpose of any condition in matter is to give you an experience in the mind. Therefore, it is possible to have an experience in the mind without engaging in the corresponding physical activity. This applies to any physical activity.
And therefore, throughout the ages you see that there are many spiritual people, yogis, saints, whatever you want to call them, who have transcended the desire for sex without engaging in it physically. And this can be done by contemplating what the experience is you are seeking to get out of it, out of the physical activity. And truly you can say that there are many motivations for why people engage in sex, there are many physical or lower motivations, but if you have transcended those, then what you are really seeking is a sense of oneness.
And of course, you can have a sense of oneness with another person, but what you are ultimately seeking is oneness with your I AM Presence. This means that you can now sublimate the desire for sex with a desire for oneness with your I AM Presence and work on achieving that with all of the myriad of tools we have given you to achieve this. And you can come to a point where the experience of oneness with your higher self is, to use a popular expression, better than sex. And when you experience this, the need for the sexual activity will fade away and you will not have a deficit concerning sex in your mind.
Now of course if you are in a relationship, you can do the same thing. You can transcend that need to use sex as a way to achieve oneness. This does not mean you cannot achieve oneness with your partner or enjoy sexual activity. It just means it is not driven by this deficit approach. And it actually opens you up to a more relaxed, natural sexual experience because you are not seeking something from your partner that your partner cannot actually give you.
Yes, you can experience union and oneness with another person, but the other person can never give you the sense of oneness with your I AM Presence because only your I AM Presence can do this.
There are many times where spiritual people are actually projecting upon their partner that they should get something from their partner that the partner could never give them. And this leads to some unreasonable expectations and has actually caused both conflict in relationships and a breakup of relationships because the one person felt that he or she was not getting from the partner what you can never get from a partner, but only from your I AM Presence.
Copyright © 2023 Kim Michaels