Question: Kim, thank you for the teachings you bring by being the messenger, it helps me a lot. I found the ascended masters teachings more than 20 years ago. I tried to figure out what my true purpose is, my divine plan. I established my connection with my higher self, learned to be aware of the messages of life, I learned forgiveness and unconditional love. Thanks to this past, my life has changed radically. But from time to time, I feel dissatisfied and lose the meaning of life, I get the feeling that I’m not living my own life. And it takes some time to find the motivation to move on. I would like to understand what is at the root of this deep dissatisfaction? How can these emotional and mental traumas be healed? How can a connection with my higher self be permanent and stable, so I can consciously manifest the kingdom of God on earth and consciously fulfill my divine plan?
Answer from Kim Michaels. This answer was given during the 2021 Webinar for Russia – Overcoming the Consciousness of Superiority and the Sense of Being Un-whole, Traumatized and Focused Outside Oneself.
Well, based on my personal experience, I would say that there is sort of a dream amongst spiritual people; I had it myself when I was younger, I’ve seen it in many, many people, that if we find the right spiritual teaching, and if we practice it very eagerly, then there will come a point where we break through. And then we are either enlightened or whatever concept people have of this, when we break through and now everything is just wonderful after that.
I had it myself for many years, I can remember during the 1990s, I was thinking: “Gosh, I’ve gone through so much in my psychology already, how much can be left?” But then, after we got all the teachings about the birth trauma, the coming from an natural planet to earth, and receiving the birth trauma and having lived for a very long time on earth, it sort of changed for me, because I realized that there is no permanent state on a planet like earth, it’s an unnatural planet.
We are going to be going through stuff in our psychology as long as we’re in embodiment, either in our personal psychology or something we take on from the collective that we are processing. So we’re always going to be dealing with something.
I think the first step there is to, at least this is what I have done, I’ve given up the idea that I should have some kind of breakthrough and now I’m in the ultimate state of consciousness, I’m enlightened. I realize that there will always be things that will come up in my psychology. The other thing that I can see is, when I look back at over 40 years I’ve been on the spiritual path is that there are certain cycles, you know—there are certain stages. There are stages where we are definitely growing.
Often, when you find a new teaching, you’re very enthusiastic about it, you’re really applying it but you’re doing it with a certain vision that you have of what you’re supposed to be doing. When I for example, found the Summit Lighthouse, I was at a certain level of consciousness and I could look at the spiritual path a certain way. So I approached it that way. But I can see also that there has been several times where I have come to a turning point. And now I was actually meant to move to a different level of the path but I had some kind of attitude, some kind of view, perception filter that prevented me from moving on, I was sort of attached to a certain way of looking at the path.
Those are the periods I could look back and I wasn’t so enthusiastic, I was maybe dissatisfied, maybe as it says here, I lost the meaning of life because it wasn’t quite so meaningful. It wasn’t so exciting. I didn’t feel like so much was happening. That’s because I wasn’t growing. Then you become dissatisfied when you’re not growing.
It’s not just a matter of traumas that need to be healed. It can be a trauma we need to deal with, but it can also be that we need to shift our attitude like I said, give up the idea of this ultimate breakthrough. Give up the idea that for example, you should be more evolved than you are. I mean I can see back many, many people in ascended master teachings who think that: “I have been on these teachings for 10 years, 20 years, I should be further along than I am, I should be at peace, I should have this, I should have that, I should have a permanent connection to my higher self. I should be able to manifest any kind of life I want.”
I think there comes a point where you just need to shift out of that, you need to give up these ideas and realize that the path is really an ongoing process of looking at ourselves, looking at our own psychology, and seeing some kind of limitation, seeing some self and letting go of it.
What you get for that is when you give up this desire for some ultimate breakthrough, you’ll get peace of mind, because you’re not always feeling like you should be better or you should be somewhere else or you should be making more progress. You know you’re growing every day and you’re simply at peace with being who you are and being where you’re at on the path, even though you’re not perfect.
I don’t worry about what level of consciousness I’m at. You can say that’s easy enough, I know I’m above the 96th level but nevertheless, I don’t worry about it as such, I just keep looking for the next thing I need to process in my psychology and then I do that. I don’t have this sense that I should be somewhere. I don’t have this anymore. I used to feel much more that: “Oh, I should be perfect as a messenger, I couldn’t make a mistake and this and that.”
Now if I make a mistake, I learn from it and then I move on. If there’s something that comes up in my psychology, I look at it and then I resolve it. I don’t resist looking at something like I did many years ago where I would resist because I couldn’t bear to have some kind of problem in my psychology.
I think it’s a matter of just shifting, and seeing that the path is an ongoing process, we will gradually improve and when we reach some ultimate level of consciousness, that’s when we can no longer hold on to the physical body, and then we ascend. That’s how I look at it. I hope that was helpful.
Copyright © 2021 Kim Michaels