How to deal with dishonesty in a close relationship

Question: How can I deal with dishonesty in a close relationship and in general? When this happens I feel naive for trusting and end up feeling fooled and betrayed. 


Answer from the Ascended Master Mother Mary through Kim Michaels. This answer was given at a conference in Estonia in 2018.

You need to – as in all cases – look at yourself first and see why you feel you have to trust this individual that has proven over again that he or she cannot be trusted. Therefore you need to also look at why you feel you have to be in a close relationship with such a person. Is there something that makes you feel that you have to do it and what then would be the reason for it? You also have to look at whether you have a separate self that relates to trusting other people and feeling betrayed when they are violating your trust. You have to look at if you come down on yourself, what you feel about having your trust misused and whether you feel obligated somehow to stay in a relationship even though the person is not trustworthy.

When you overcome these selves you can perhaps find a more direct way to deal with the other person and confront the person with the dishonesty and perhaps this can change the dynamic of the relationship, perhaps it cannot. If people are dishonest, they obviously have a very deep psychological issue and if they’re not willing to work on that issue your best option can be to simply move on from the relationship and leave that person behind. But it is certainly valuable to first attempt if you can help the person overcome this tendency but in order to do this fully you have to first overcome in yourself your reactionary patterns to the situation. In other words, you need to overcome this tendency to want to change the other person in order to avoid a certain feeling in yourself. Then you can be neutral about it and then it will also be much easier for you to make a decision as to whether you want to stay in the relationship or not.

 

Copyright © 2018 Kim Michaels