Don’t have sex or don’t feel guilty about it

TOPICS: Fallen beings engineered association between sexuality and sin – the lie of original sin – making people feel guilty as a way to control them – the true original sin – why there is no reason to feel guilty – the catch-22 of guilt – abstaining from sex can make you judgmental – the spiritual path does not have to be a struggle – seeking the middle way – spiritualizing sex – sexual fantasies show imbalance – letting go of fallen consciousness concerning sex – diverting sexual energies – levels of how to deal with sex – transcending the force-based state of consciousness –

Question: I recently read about a study done by Kansas University involving 14,500 people. The study showed that atheists felt less guilt after having sex than religious people. The strongest feelings of guilt were found in groups of very devout religious people, such as Mormons (funny, since they have so many children), Jehova’s Witnesses and Baptists, followed by Catholics. Having been on the spiritual path for many years, I have noticed that even many spiritual people have an ambivalent view of sex and struggle with various feelings of guilt or repression. Does Jesus have any recommendations for how spiritual people should look at sex? I mean, guilt does not seem to be a very spiritual emotion.

Answer from ascended master Jesus through Kim Michaels: (June 8, 2011)

I give you two options:

Option 1: Don’t have sex.

Option 2: Don’t feel guilty about having sex.

Anything else is simply being lukewarm, and that will not give you maximum spiritual growth.

Let us first look at a historical perspective. When I walked the earth 2,000 years ago, there was no general or widespread sense of guilt associated with sexuality. The association between sexuality and sin was deliberately engineered by certain fallen beings in embodiment. They set themselves up as leaders of the Catholic Church and turned my teachings into one of the most efficient mind-control machines the world has ever seen.

Their reasoning was simple. They knew that the best way to control people is through a combination of guilt and fear. The fear was produced by focusing on sin, the idea that you have done something that prevents you from going to heaven. They then enlarged the concept of a hell for those who had not compensated for their sins, and this induced fear into the mass consciousness.

The next question was how to best produce guilt. Well, why not find an activity that most humans engage in and label it as sinful? Eating was one candidate, but since you have to eat, it wasn’t the best. Sex was far better, because you can live without having sex, yet most people have a natural urge to have sex. Thus, it was easy to set up a tension based on labeling people’s natural desire as sinful.

They then created the concept of “original sin” which says that you are conceived in sin. This led to the entire myth that I was conceived by the Spirit and born of a virgin, meaning I was the only human not conceived in a sinful way. Once this concept had been induced into the mass consciousness, it pretty much followed by itself that people started associating sexuality with guilt.

The fallen beings knew that most people would not want to stop having sex. So they knew people would have sex and feel guilty about it, which reinforced their co-dependency upon the fallen beings. This tapped into the age-old artificially created mindset that people had done something for which they needed to compensate, and that the only possible compensation was to follow the outer rules given by the fallen beings who were the leaders of their church.

It is this very mindset that to this day is the driving force behind the power of official Christian churches. And if you want to talk about sin, then the fallen consciousness is indeed the original sin and the only sin. Sin is the mindset that you have the power to choose to do something, but once you have done it, you do not have the power to free yourself from it by your own choices. You can choose to sin, but you cannot choose to transcend sin—for you need the fallen beings in order to do that.

From the very beginning, the fallen beings have attempted to deceive people into following them by creating a problem and then setting themselves up as the “saviors” who can help people overcome the problem. The problem being, that the problem was never real, as everything the fallen beings do is based on a lie. So if you take Portia’s teachings on free will, you see that there is no reason to feel guilty about doing anything.

Now, I know some people will instantly approach this statement from a black-and-white perspective and say I am advocating that you can do anything you want. Yet if you study Portia’s dictation, you see that this is not so. What Portia is saying is that you have free will, so you have the right to experiment with anything you can do on earth. Yet everything you do has a consequence, and you will inevitably experience that consequence.

In other words, there is no point in feeling guilt. In fact, continuing to do something while feeling guilty about it is simply an ego-game—one of the ways in which the ego keeps you in a lower state of consciousness. Of course, you have free will, so you have the right to choose to engage in this ego-game. But then you don’t need my advice.

So if you come to the realization that you do not want to experience a given consequence, you change the state of consciousness that produces the consequence. However, such a change is brought about by an “Aha” experience leading to a conscious decision—and not by guilt. Guilt truly is not a productive emotion, because it does not actually motivate you to change your state of consciousness. It springs from the fallen consciousness, so how can it help you transcend that consciousness? So guilt only puts you in a struggle to change an outer behavior, which is very difficult when you are not looking at the causative state of consciousness. The fallen beings know this also.

So the mature spiritual seekers will evaluate actions based on whether you want to experience the consequence of those actions. Do the inevitable consequences of my actions enhance my growth towards a higher state of consciousness, or do they impede that growth?

I know some spiritual people will say that having sex will not enhance your spiritual growth—on the contrary. However, this is a black-and-white viewpoint that springs from the fallen consciousness and is linked to the entire concept of sex as sin. The Living Christ takes the perspective of a practical realist.

As the collective consciousness is right now – and will be for the foreseeable future – the only way to produce children is through sexual intercourse. Thus, your physical bodies and even your emotional bodies are “wired” to produce sexual desires. This is what the fallen beings knew and what they took advantage of. The fallen beings also understood that this natural desire has been inflated by various factors, so that many people have an insatiable desire for sex—a desire that can never be satisfied.

The Living Christ makes this distinction and realizes that it is indeed necessary for a spiritual person to transcend the insatiable or dualistic desire for sex—because it consumes your attention and takes it away from spiritual activities. Yet this is not the same as suppressing all sexual desire. So the practical way to look at sex is how to deal with it in a way that does not detract from your spiritual growth.

As I said in another answer about fasting, you do not grow by taking extreme positions. Thus, seeking to force yourself to suppress all sexual desire is not the best way to grow, especially if it is done from a black-and-white perspective of thinking sex is wrong and that forcing yourself to abstain will guarantee some spiritual benefit.

The brutal fact is that over the centuries many religious people have forced themselves to abstain from sex, but the sheer mental force necessary has put them into a state of consciousness in which they become very judgmental towards other people. Such people subconsciously reason that since they are struggling, then everyone who is not struggling as much as they are cannot be as spiritual.

This has created a very dysfunctional mindset, in which many people think they have to struggle with the spiritual path and that the more they struggle with various self-imposed or guru-imposed disciplines, the more they make progress. And thus, such people feel it is their duty, even a mission mandated by God, that they go around judging other people. Yet this is simply looking at the splinter in the eye of another as an excuse for not looking at the beam in your own eye.

Of course, suppressing sexual desires through force can also lead to various activities – power games of all kinds, including those involving sex – that are far more detrimental to your spiritual growth than a balanced sex life. Just look at the sex-abuse scandal in the Catholic Church. Which, by the way, is partly the Church’s karmic return for being instrumental in causing so many people to feel guilty about sex.

It is necessary to take a more balanced approach to the spiritual path. There is indeed a phase on the path, where you have to raise your consciousness above the downward pull of the mass consciousness. And during this stage, it is necessary to go through various disciplines, that involve abstaining from some of the actions that pull you down. And for people who have had their sexual desires inflated or have been addicted to sex or pornography, it can indeed be necessary to abstain from sex during this phase, even if it does require a struggle. I gave another answer about sex several years ago that was given for people at this level of the path.

Yet as I say throughout this website, balance is the key ingredient of spiritual growth. So once you have raised your consciousness beyond the mass consciousness, you need to work towards a balanced approach; the Middle Way spoken of by the Buddha—which I simply called “The Way.” If you keep forcing yourself to follow more and more extreme disciplines, you will actually take yourself into a blind alley, where you might feel holier than other people, but you are not making any spiritual progress. Because in the more advanced stages, your main challenge is to flow with the River of Life—and this requires you to transcend the mindset that sees force as the only solution.

So how does this relate to sex? Well, living a balanced life means that you overcome any division between “human” activities and spiritual activities. You spiritualize all activities, including sex. This means you can live a normal active life without feeling that your daily activities are contrary to your spiritual growth.

Obviously, your goal is to be the open door for the Presence, and that requires a certain amount of attention on the Presence. Which means you do not want anything that distracts you too much from going within. So the question is how to make sure that sex is not such a distraction. How can this best be achieved—by forcing yourself to abstain from sex or by finding a balanced approach to sex?

If you are living in a committed relationship, you might acknowledge the fact that your physical and emotional bodies produce sexual desires. You can then look for a way to deal with this desire that produces the least amount of distractions. And for most people, forcing yourself to abstain from sex will be a struggle that becomes a distraction. In other words, forcing yourself to abstain from sex can draw your attention towards the body far more than having a balanced sexual relationship with your partner without feeling guilty about it.

What I am saying is that you can transcend the insatiable aspect of sexual desire and find a balanced approach. One measure of this could be how much you think about having sex. In a balanced relationship, you find a frequency based on the desires of both partners. When you have sex, you enjoy it, and when you are not having sex, it is really not on your mind. Thinking about sex when you are not having it – especially if you indulge in sexual fantasies – is a sign of a lack of balance.

It is also helpful to acknowledge that the expression “having sex” is not truly the highest way to look at sex. Modern society has pulled this act down to a level of being very physical. And certainly, it is very possible to drag the sex act into the mud and turn it into an activity that is clearly detrimental to spiritual growth. Yet there is also the potential to elevate the act of making love to a spiritual activity, that has a very important function in terms of uniting two partners and helping them achieve a higher sense of unity and oneness.

Thus, if you are a spiritual person and if you are living in a committed relationship, I encourage you to make an effort to let go of the “sin and guilt” baggage relating to sexual activity. Far too many spiritual people have burdened or ruined their relationships because they have not let go of the fallen consciousness concerning sex.

When I was in embodiment, I had sex with Mary Magdalene, but it was not a sexual activity but a spiritual activity that enabled us to achieve a higher degree of oneness in our relationship. Since you are in a physical body and since the body offers you this opportunity, why not take advantage of it? Rejecting such an option is not truly spiritual—especially when the rejection is based on the fallen consciousness.

I understand that this offers little comfort for people who are not in a committed relationship. For such people it is indeed valid to turn down the sexual desires, as you do not want to start a relationship based on sexual desire. You want to keep it at a level, where you can wait for the right spiritual partner to come along.

Yet this does not mean that you suppress your sexual desires through force. You can divert the sexual energies from the base chakra to the upper chakras, as I talk about elsewhere.

So as a summary, let me talk about several levels in how spiritual people might deal with sex:

  • The beginning stage is where you need to raise yourself above the mass consciousness, which of course seeks to inflate sexual desires, so that the fallen beings can control you through insatiable desires that take your attention away from spiritual activities. At this stage, alertness, discipline and even abstinence are the tools to use, as described in my earlier answer.
  • Once you rise above the insatiable sexual desires, it is possible to have a balanced sex life in a committed relationship, where the partners satisfy each others sexual desires, so that these desires do not detract from their spiritual pursuits. Sex becomes an innocent, playful activity that requires little thought before or after.
  • At a higher level, a committed couple can raise their sexual activities beyond the level of physical sex and turn them into a spiritual activity aimed at producing a higher union.
  • It is also possible that people can transcend all sexual desires. This is, of course, especially applicable for single people. But certainly, couples can also reach this level. However, this level is not necessarily more spiritual or right than the previous level. In fact, it is difficult to get to this stage without going through the previous stages. Once you have achieved a balanced relationship with sex and even gone beyond to spiritualizing your sexual relationship, it is easier to grow beyond sexual desires in a balanced way.

You do see the point, don’t you? What keeps you out of the ascended state of consciousness is the force-based state of consciousness. So this is the mindset you need to transcend. Thus, doing anything that reinforces this state of consciousness will slow down your growth.

Insatiable sexual desires and all sexual perversions are the products of the force-based state of consciousness. Seeking to overcome these desires by using the force-based state of consciousness simply will not work. You do not truly transcend sexual desires by forcefully abstaining from sex. You transcend them by being able to engage in sex without feeling there is anything dirty or sinful about it.

Thus, for all spiritual people, it is important to go through the stages outlined above and come to a more spiritual and non-attached relationship with their sexuality. And on this journey, it is essential to overcome all tendency to associate sex with guilt. It is not God or the ascended masters who want you to feel guilty for having sex. It is only the fallen beings and your own ego.


 Copyright © 2011 by Kim Michaels