Question: I have been on the path for a long time, and I fully understand and accept the concept of free will and separate selves that react. But I still feel totally vulnerable to the energies and aggression of people. Even if I do not accept what they say and do to me, I still can’t escape their attacks. It is like I am standing in front of them, completely naked, and I cannot stand up to an attack, I cannot defend myself. Despite a fairly developed consciousness, this does not help me. I still feel a lot of pain from almost every interaction with the world. I interact very actively and try to express my Christhood, expressing myself in love, light and dedication. I still cannot get used to the fact that people react and act aggressively and reject me, reject my love. Although I understand this, it is always a certain shock and sharp pain. Please show me what I may not see, what selves it may be, and what I can do to free myself from this excessive sensitivity and vulnerability.
Answer from the Ascended Master Mother Mary through Kim Michaels. This answer was given during the 2021 Webinar – Ending the Era of Ideology.
Well, my beloved, what you are describing is the experience that most avatars that have come to earth have had. You come here with the intention to help people. You are doing this out of love and wanting to set them free. And then, when you attempt to show them, or explain to them how they can be free, they either ignore you, but in many cases, they aggressively reject you, want to put you down, want to silence you, want to make you wrong, or they even attack you physically.
This is an experience that all of us who have come as avatars have had. That at some point, we faced this shock that, even though we are here to help people, they do not want our help and they reject us and they aggressively try to silence us. This is what, for most people, was the experience that caused what we have called the cosmic birth trauma—the first major trauma you received after coming to earth. It may have taken various different forms for various people. But there was always that sense of shock of the fact that you are coming, and you are being non-aggressive, but you are being met with an aggressive reaction.
What you really need to do is use the tools and teachings we have given to try to uncover the birth trauma. Not in the sense that you just understand it intellectually, but that you actually experience it. And go through the process of seeing the self that was created as a result of birth trauma, and letting that self die. And even seeing what other selves were created, in order to defend yourself, or to avoid having the same experience ever again.
These are important tools. But you also need to do what this messenger has been doing since he got in contact with his original birth trauma, and let go of it. And that is he has been actually realizing that the reason why he experienced that trauma was that he came to earth with a certain attitude, certain expectations, a certain mindset. And this was what he needed to look at and free himself from, in order to be free of earth.
What I recommend is that you use the tools, you especially use my visualization for going through different layers, getting back to that theater where you are on the stage and you see these separate selves. But you also ask for my help and you contemplate in your own mind also, what is my basic attitude to earth? What do I think I am here for, what do I think I should accomplish, what do I think should happen on earth? What is my basic attitude to people? What do I think they should or should not be doing? How do I think they should respond to me?
And then you need to recognize here that it is not that an avatar is not here to make a positive change on earth. But an avatar is also here to learn something from being on earth. And what you need to learn from earth is what you had not learned on a natural planet, what you had not seen in yourself on a natural planet, especially relating to free will. Many avatars have the attitude that you think you actually respect free will because you would not force somebody else, and you are not being aggressive towards them. And therefore, you feel that other people should not be aggressive towards you.
But first of all, you need to recognize here, that on a planet like earth, there is no guarantee of this. It is very true that Jesus said: “Do unto others what you want them to do to you.” But he did not say that if you do not do certain things to others, they will not do the same things to you. He never said that. And that is because of free will, and a lower level of consciousness on earth, no guarantee that if you do not treat other people aggressively, they will not treat you aggressively. You need to recognize this.
And you need to come to accept that that is not only a matter of free will, but the state of the collective consciousness on this planet. If you have this expectation in yourself, that you should not be treated aggressively when you are not aggressive, it is an unrealistic expectation. It was very realistic on a natural planet, but it is not realistic on an unnatural planet.
You need to look at: Why do you have this belief? Where does it come from? What does it say about your actual attitude to free will, and that you do not fully accept free will? Because, if you fully accepted free will, you would not have the expectation that people should not treat you a certain way. You cannot have that if you fully accept free will.
This messenger has gone through a process, a gradual process of realizing that he did not fully accept free will when he came. He was not aggressive, and he would not force others. But he did not fully accept free will. And therefore, he had certain expectations. And those expectations caused him to react a certain way, when he was met with rejection and aggressiveness on earth. And in order to be free of that reactionary pattern, he needed to look at the expectation, the attitude to the planet, to people, to people in duality, to fallen beings, and investigate this entire mindset that actually brought him to earth, that caused him to decide to descend to a planet like this.
And this is what you all need to do, who are avatars, in order to be free of this planet, and rise above the mindset that brought you here. Because the mindset that brought you here cannot take you away from here, it can only keep you here, until you have transcended it, because that is what you really wanted to accomplish by coming here.
Yes, you wanted to have a positive impact on the planet. But, how do you have a positive impact on the planet? Not by changing other people, but by changing yourself. You have a positive impact on the planet by overcoming any pattern in your own psychology. Thereby, you pull up on the collective. Thereby, you make it possible that some people will also be able to transcend their own psychology.
There will also be some that will not, and they are the ones who are aggressive. But you cannot let them dominate your experience on earth. And therefore, you need to free yourself from these patterns, so that you can stand in front of their aggression. You can stand naked, in front of them. But it does not paralyze you, it does not pain you.
This messenger has since early childhood in this lifetime, and certainly in other lifetimes as well, had that same experience, that he felt an inner prompting to approach people, to be active, to be outgoing, to do something positive. But almost every interaction with other people caused him a certain pain in his heart. And he has not gotten over it until he started looking at these very deep issues that brought him here. His attitude to what he was supposed to accomplish, what was supposed to happen or not happen to him on earth.
And it is the same thing for all of us. We have to examine this. What brought us here, and that will then allow us to transcend it, to let those selves die, to let those beliefs die, and to simply feel free, feel free to leave the earth, even if you have not accomplished anything on earth. Even if you have not fulfilled any part of the vision you had that caused you to want to go here, what you thought you could accomplish. You can still leave the earth behind in peace and say: “I have had enough of the experiences I can have on this planet.” It is possible.
Many of you are not nearly as far away from it as you think. Even though you may still feel the pain, and still feel the hopelessness of why will it not go away with all the work you have done on yourself—all the psychological work, all the spiritual work and you still feel this pain. Why will it not go away?
But nevertheless, many of you are much closer than you think to making that, often a very subtle shift, where you change the way you look at life on earth. And you realize that nothing ultimately matters on an unnatural planet. And if nothing ultimately matters, nothing defines you. And if nothing defines you, why should anything on earth define how you experience being on earth?
And it is only when you can be on earth, be exposed to the aggressiveness of other people, be exposed to the very things that gave you the cosmic birth trauma, and you have no reaction to it, that you are truly free.
And you can all achieve it. Believe me, you can all achieve it by using the tools, not in a mechanical way, but in a creative way, by asking for our help, by being willing to continue to look deeper and deeper, to look behind this belief. Look behind the next belief, and continue until you get to the very core of how you approach being on a planet like earth. It is only when you free yourself from your approach to earth, that you can depart earth.
Copyright © 2021 Kim Michaels