Question: I am about to take an important step in my life of marrying someone. But this decision is riddled with doubts. On one hand, we have a great relationship and are aligned in our high-level goals, such as self-development and growing spiritually. But I often feel a deep, strong fear about this step. I wonder if I am truly making the right choice. On one hand, I fear not having had enough partners or experiences to settle down and that I might be continuing the relationship more out of fear of losing it and being alone. However, as time goes by, I feel more and more that marrying is the right choice and that those fears are based on separate selves. But what really confuses me is that I wonder if this fear impulse not to marry comes from the separate self, or is it a true impulse from my I AM Presence that is trying to keep me from doing a wrong turn and delay my Divine plan? How can I better distinguish between lower and higher impulses, mainly on important decisions?
Answer from the Ascended Master Mother Mary through Kim Michaels. This answer was given during the 2023 Kazakhstan Conference.
Well, this is again a question that applies to many, many people, not just about marrying, but about many other important decisions in life.
We have, of course, spoken about similar things before, but let us at least give some thoughts on this. First of all, your I AM Presence does not project fear into your being. The ascended masters do not project fear into your being. When there is fear, you know that it either comes from separate selves or it comes from dark forces such as the entities in the collective consciousness.
In a sense, you could say that whenever you are trying to make an important decision, the dark forces will always try to make you doubt it in order to create chaos and confusion in your mind. However, it is also important not to go into the state of mind where you say: “Oh, any doubt and fear just comes from the dark forces, so I just need to ignore it and get married.” That is not what I am saying. But what I am saying is that you can do something about the fear. You can make the calls for Archangel Michael and Astrea to protect you and cut you free. You can seek to go into a neutral state of mind and you can ask your I AM Presence and your ascended teachers for directions.
If you can be neutral about this, you will get some directions. In some cases, when you have doubts about marrying, it is because you do not sense that there is something in the situation that is not the highest possible. This may in some cases mean that your I AM Presence is trying to warn you about marrying, but it is not doing so through fear. The more neutral it can be, the more you can get that inner knowing where you suddenly see: “No, this is not the right step to take.”
But it can also be that your I AM Presence is making you aware that there are certain aspects of the situation that you have not seen, that you have not resolved, and it would be important to resolve those before you actually marry. What am I trying to say here? I am trying to say, if you feel fear, use the spiritual tools to do something about the fear. Seek to go into a neutral state of mind and then see: “Is there something about this situation I need to see? Is there something about my partner I need to see? Is there something about my own attitude to marriage that I need to see?”
You also need to be aware of how the analytical mind will always try to present you with arguments. And if you look at how the question is formulated, you will see this, that as time goes on, as time goes by, I feel more and more that marrying is the right choice. This is often a sign that the analytical mind is trying to analyze the situation. And that is where you need to then make the effort to go into a neutral state of mind and ask to be shown a higher view that is beyond intellectual argumentation. Many, many people have had doubts about making an important decision. And in many cases, that doubt comes from their ascended teachers or their I AM Presence, because there is something they need to look at and resolve in the situation. But they then use their intellectual minds to argue why the doubt is not important, why they do not need to look at this. They are arguing themselves into doing it despite the doubt. This often then at a later stage comes back to them and they realize that it was not actually the ideal situation.
In the case you that you have doubt, seek to resolve the doubt before you take an irreversible step. It can be that the doubt comes from lower forces. But still, if you use the tools to protect yourself, you cannot really lose by looking at the doubt, because you might very well see something in your own psychology. There can be some separate selves that it would be beneficial to resolve before you make it. For example, consider what is your view, your attitude, your approach to relationships? How do you see yourself in a relationship? Have you, as we talked about earlier, really decided what kind of a partner you want, what kind of relationship you want? Or are you just going into this because this was what happened to manifest? It can be valid for many people to not marry early, but to gain more experiences so you gain more clarity about what kind of a relationship you want. Of course, today you can say it is not, in many cases, so difficult to get a divorce, so it is not such a drastic step to get married. But there are still many countries where it is a drastic step to marry, because it is not so easy to walk away from it.
Copyright © 2023 Kim Michaels