Question: I have a question that I have been waiting for an answer to all of my life. I hope the ascended masters will give me a broader understanding. The question is about virginity. All my life, I have intuitively felt that my future husband should be like me. But in my life, I have met men who have already had sexual relations, tried to seduce me into marrying them, and criticized me in every way for still being chaste. Still, I felt it was the demons of Mara who came to me and just tried to confuse me into breaking my vow of chastity before marriage. But they failed, and I walked away from such men, because I still believe that if I keep my innocence, I will surely meet a husband like me. I would like to know the opinion of the ascended masters on that. Will I meet someone like me, if I continue to resist mockery and condemnation from society in every possible way, and why do people react so negatively to people like me?
Answer from the Ascended Master Mother Mary through Kim Michaels. This answer was given during the 2022 Ukraine Webinar.
You have the old saying by Einstein, “if you keep doing the same thing, and expect different results, you are insane”. I am not saying you are insane, but I am saying that your approach is unbalanced. If you keep doing what you have been doing, you will end up never being married and therefore having to deal with that situation.
What you are doing is you are using your outer mind to impose some kind of criteria on yourself and your relationship. It is, in a sense, a self-sabotage syndrome. What you need to do is use our tools for psychological healing to find out why it is that there are separate selves in your being that do not want you to get married and therefore they are causing you to believe in this criterion that will block you from getting married.
I am not saying you should get married, that is a free-will decision. But right now, you are not making a free-will decision. You are allowing some separate selves to push you into an unbalanced reaction. When it comes to having a relationship, the ideal way to approach this is to use your intuition to sense when here is a person that it is in your divine plan to have a relationship with. But you cannot use your intuition unless you are neutral. And by imposing this demand, that your husband should be a virgin like you, you are not neutral, and therefore you cannot receive intuitive insights.
You are instead approaching the entire issue of relationships with your outer mind, and you are going around in circles, thereby being unable to tune in to your divine plan. It does not matter whether your husband is a virgin or not. What matters is, is he the person that you decided in your divine plan that you wanted to marry? But how will you know this if your outer mind is so fixated on this outer criterion?
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