Setting boundaries on the spiritual path

Question: I have a question about fear of bringing the light of God down through your four lower bodies. If you have the experience of only attracting positive things but also people who are kind of invasive because they are so desperately attracted to the joy and the love you send out. The fear around that is that like an intuitive warning – you are not ready, you need to grow stronger or is it just an idea projected in your mind to prevent you from bringing the light down. 


 

Answer from the Ascended Master Mother Mary through Kim Michaels. This answer was given at a conference in Holland in 2018

A very important question my beloved, in the sense that you all face the issue of having to find a personal balance there. It is correct that in some cases when you grow on the path, when you become more of an open door for the light from your I AM Presence, people will be attracted to this. There will be some people that what we might call more positive, that are attracted to it because they see you have something they don’t have. But there will also be some that are attracted to this because they think they can take it from you. When this happens to you, it does not mean that you are wrong for expressing your light. It does not mean you should be afraid of it or you should stop it.

It is an opportunity for you to recognise that part of growing on the path is to increase your discernment. Discernment is not the same as the dualistic fear-based judgement. It is a Christ-based discernment and it is based on what helps people grow and what doesn’t help people grow. So you need to be discerning and say that there are some people where they just want to take my light and misuse it and therefore it doesn’t help them to grow that I give it to them and so I don’t. But you can also look at yourself and say:” What is my attitude to life and to other people?” And then you recognise that many of you have a desire to help others and to be a positive person in the world, of positive influence in the world and that has been part of the driving force that have driven you to rise to the current level of your path, where you can be the open door for the light.

The next step up is to look at this also with more discernment and then recognise that there could be certain aspects of your attitude that are not the highest possible. As the messenger described, he thought he had to be kind to all people and be able to have a harmonious relationship to all people, which in his mind had translated to a great reluctance to actually say no to people. Many of you have this where you feel that whenever somebody comes to you and demands something from you, you have to give them what they want or at least you have to try to help them. Or if they come to you and try to get you into some kind of argument or disharmony, you feel like you should try to get them to be harmonious or you should try to have a harmonious relationship with them or you should change yourself or bend in order to accommodate that. This is an example of how your positive view of life that has helped you rise to a certain level can now become a hindrance and you need to look at it and simply develop your discernment and recognise that on a planet like this you are not meant to be kind and positive and open and loving and harmonious with everybody. You are actually meant to discern, maybe not consciously but certainly intuitively, what level is a certain person at and can I help that person or not? If you intuitively sense that you cannot help another person, perhaps because they are not willing to change, perhaps they want to steal your light then you have a right to choose not to interact with such people. 

This very much is a matter of as you grow in Christhood, as you become more and more aware of your Divine Plan, as I’ve said earlier, you begin to focus on what you can deal with and what you are not meant to deal with – what is part of your Divine Plan, what is not part of your Divine Plan. There are certain people that it is part of your Divine Plan to help. There are other people that it’s not part of your Divine Plan to help deal with and therefore you have a right to select these people out of your life. It is not an unkindness, it is not that you are ignoring people or putting them down. You are just realising those I cannot help and therefore I have a right to choose that I do not want to deal with that level of consciousness. When you make that decision in yourself you are drawing a boundary. You will find that over time, perhaps you will be challenged several times to reinforce the boundary but over time you will begin to attract these people less and less. It’s simply because the dark forces who are always trying to derail your progress, they realise that they cannot derail your progress through these people any more, so what’s the point in sending them. They will try to find some other way but then you just continue to increase your discernment so you become able to see through that as well. It is very important that you come to a certain level where you recognise this. You have the right to set boundaries and you can look at a lower level of a certain path, many people have the sense, for example, that you have to be kind and loving to everybody. It’s perfectly alright to have that at a certain level but then you comet to that higher level where you begin to say, “Who am I meant to help according to my Divine Plan?” Then I focus on those people and I ignore the others, no matter how aggressive or persistent they are. 

Question: What if it is family?

Yes, my Beloved. We understand that family is a challenge. You need to realise that there are levels of consciousness. There is a certain level of consciousness where it is constructive for you to say, “I must have chosen to incarnate in a family with these people for a reason. Why have I done this?” You need to ask yourself first of all,”What am I meant to learn about myself? What am I meant to see and resolve in my own psychology, so that I can find a constructive way to deal with my family members?” So this is a legitimate state of your path but there comes a higher level of your path and basically it could be expressed in different ways but we can say it this way. When you have overcome a certain level of consciousness in yourself, you have a right to make the choice that you don’t want to deal any more with people who are at a corresponding level of consciousness. 

Now for example, many of you are spiritual people are not aggressive people but you have certain family members that are very aggressive. That doesn’t mean that you have to come to see that you have aggression in yourself. In most cases it means that you have to come to see that you have the opposite polarity of being too accommodating, too unwilling to draw boundaries. When you come to the point where you have seen this, you have resolved it in yourself, you have resolved the underlying belief, for example that you thought you had to be kind to everybody. 

Then you have a right to say, “I have transcended that level of consciousness and now I really don’t want to have to deal with these very aggressive people any more.” This applies also if they are family members. So you have two options here. You have the one option is that you can break off physical contact with your family members. But you also have the option that you can find a different way to deal with them where you simply don’t allow them to express their aggression or whatever it may be or you don’t respond to it as you have been used to doing. You find a new way where you let it pass through you without reacting to it. So it’s a choice you have to make. Do I want to break off physical contact with my family members or not? Of course when you look at the world, you can see that there are some countries where the bond between family members is much stronger than in others. In many of what we have talked about that are the more affluent nations, especially in the west, you can see that the family ties are no longer as strong as they were generations ago. But many nations, for example in Asia, have much stronger family ties still. 

So, it is a matter of being sensitive to your culture but you do need to come to a point on the spiritual path where you recognise that a family on earth is sort of an artificial division. Because as you grow towards higher levels of Christhood and recognise the importance of oneness, you recognise you have a certain oneness with all people. In a sense, the human family is your extended family. There may come a point where it is necessary for you to look at your attitude, your view of family and even though it may cause condemnation from your family members, you may have a right to say: “ I am selecting this family member out of my life.” It is a right you have. Now my beloved, be careful here. I’m not encouraging all of you to do this. I’m encouraging all of you to go through the process of learning what you need to learn, overcoming what you need to overcome in your own consciousness. I’m not saying you should go out and say, I don’t want to deal with this family member because he disturbs me and makes me uncomfortable and in order to avoid having to look at myself, I’m going to break-off contact. This is not what I’m encouraging. If you have done that then I encourage you to go back into a situation and deal with what it is you need to deal with in your psychology, so that you can now be completely non-reactive to that family member. But when you have risen to the level, where you are non-reactive then you have a right to say: “I just don’t want these kind of people in my life.” 

 

Copyright © 2018 Kim Michaels