How to get enough love?

Question: How can I be free from my fear of not getting my emotional needs being met? I try to get love and attention but feel that I do not get enough.


 

Answer from the Ascended Master Mother Mary through Kim Michaels. This answer was given at a conference in Estonia in 2018. 

YOU, are not feeling that you are not getting enough love and attention, you have a separate self that is projecting that you are not getting enough love and attention and this separate self can never get enough love and attention. The need of this separate self can never be fulfilled. It’s a black hole. No matter how much love and attention you put into it, it will not be filled up, so you need to recognize here that self exists, you need to use the tools and teachings we have given on how to overcome it and let it die. Then you can begin to look at it from a different perspective and you can realize that really, in order to get enough love and attention, you can not get it from an outside source, you can not get it from other people. You can only get it from within yourself and your I Am Presence is perfectly capable of giving you enough love and attention when you no longer have that unfulfillable need. 

This of course requires you to tune in to your I Am Presence and that requires you again to overcome the separate self but to also to cultivate putting your attention on your I Am Presence. You may have to overcome other separate selves as for example this messenger realized many years ago. He was not accepting himself and back then he didn’t have the teachings on the separate selves but he realized that in order for him to feel accepted, he needed to first accept himself. Which of course means overcoming the separate self that is projecting that you are not worthy to be accepted, you are not acceptable according to some standard. 

This is what you need to look at and then you will find that it will come from inside yourself. You could basically say that when you are a mature spiritual student and I am not saying that new people on the path can’t understand this teaching but when you are a mature spiritual student you need to come to the point where you recognize that the only way to have your desires truly fulfilled, for example the desire for love and attention, is to get it from within yourself because in order to have good relationships with other people you can not approach them from a state of lack. 

In other words most relationships in the world are based on both parties feeling a state of lack and hoping that the other person can fill that lack they feel in themselves. This is precisely why most relationships in the world are dysfunctional. When you come to a certain point on the spiritual path you need to realize that it is your responsibility to fill your basic emotional needs from inside yourself and when you do this you can start having relationships with other people that are not based on lack, that are not based on thinking that other people can fill the hole in yourself, that it is actually your responsibility to fill. 

It is not that you actually fill the hole, you simply need to overcome the self that is blocking the love from your I Am Presence from flowing into your four lower bodies. Or you could even say that it is your self that prevents you from seeing that your I Am Presence is constantly showering you with love and attention. Then you can have relationships where you might actually get the love and attention that you craved but could never get before but you are not actually no longer needing it from other people and therefore you are not blaming the other person if he or she can not fill your needs. When two people are at the point where they are not blaming each other, that is when their relationship can become an upward spiral instead of being this often a downward spiral where they become more and more dissatisfied with each other and more and more blaming toward each other.

 

Copyright © 2018 Kim Michaels

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