Healing severe trauma and childhood abuse

TOPICS: As you approach Christhood, you become a target for dark forces – chaos in your childhood is one such attack – determine to seek healing with all means – you are not alone – be very determined to get spiritual protection – use spiritual tools – seek professional help – abuse an opportunity to learn about your own psychology – seeking to help others – bringing the judgment – envelop the situation in forgiveness – overcome guilt or sense of responsibility – overcome sense that you can never go back to God – your I AM Presence – accept responsibility for your reaction to the abuse – division of soul vehicle – taking back your will power – you gave up your will, and you must take it back – do not believe that you are a bad person – replace original decisions for how you reacted to abuse – healing can be painful but worth the effort –

Question: How do I, in practical ways, take back dominion of my will, and my I AM Presence, when this was stolen from me through extreme abuse as a very young child?

Answer from ascended master Jesus through Kim Michaels:

It is difficult to give a general answer to a question like this. The reason being that there are so many individual factors at play. In other words, there can be several reasons a lifestream is exposed to severe abuse, and there are many different scenarios for how such abuse affects the lifestream. So in the following answer I will focus on the type of lifestreams who are most likely to study this website.

As you will see from my discourse on the stages of spiritual development, the people on this planet are at several levels of consciousness. The type of lifestreams who are likely to be attracted to this website are people who have reached a more advanced level of spiritual maturity and are on the path to personal Christhood. These are precisely the type of lifestreams that are a threat to the dark forces who are working against God’s vision for humankind as a whole and for individual lifestreams. In other words, when you begin to manifest your personal Christhood, you will become a target for the dark forces. They will do anything in their power to prevent you from manifesting and expressing that Christhood while you are here on earth.

One of the plots used by such dark forces is to create the greatest possible amount of chaos in your childhood, so that your life’s mission is distorted or even aborted at the outset. In their attempts to do this, dark forces will seek to take over weak-minded individuals around you and use them to expose you to severe abuse. Obviously, I am not saying that all people who are abused are on the path to Christhood or that every lifestream who manifests a degree of Christhood will necessarily be abused. What I am saying is that if you have been abused as a child, and if you are open to the teachings on this website, you should consider yourself to be an advanced lifestream, and you should consider that the abuse you experienced was a direct attack against your lifestream, precipitated by dark forces.

Based on this recognition, I would hope you would reach the conclusion that you cannot allow anything that happened to you in this world to stand in the way of the goal of manifesting your Christhood and fulfilling your spiritual mission for this lifetime. Therefore, I would hope people would make the decision to pursue any avenue possible in order to heal the wounds they received in childhood, and leave them permanently behind, so that they can get on with their mission and Christhood.

If you will make this decision and if you will follow through by taking advantage of all avenues of healing, you will find that there will be an extraordinary help and support from above. Contrary to what you might have been taught as you were growing up, or what you might have concluded as a result of the abuse, you are not alone. You have a Christ self and you have angels and ascended beings assigned to help your lifestream overcome all obstacles and manifest your Christhood. If you will call to us with an open mind, you will receive the help and guidance you need in order to take the next step toward healing.

The first practical step you need to take to put childhood abuse (or any type of abuse) behind you is to recognize the fact that the abuse was an attack on your lifestream by dark forces. This should make it obvious that you need to make a very determined effort to establish or reestablish your spiritual protection. This involves making diligent use of appropriate techniques for spiritual protection, and we give several such techniques on our other website. If you will make use of these techniques, you will gradually establish a wall of light around your energy field, and this will make you less vulnerable to negative thoughts or energies projected at you from dark forces. However, you should also call specifically for Archangel Michael to bind and consume all dark forces who have invaded your energy field and your lifestream. For more details, see my answer to a question on how to overcome addiction.

The next practical step you can take is to recognize that when you are exposed to severe trauma and abuse, especially when it happens in childhood, it is virtually inevitable that your lifestream will become fragmented. I have given detailed teachings on this in the answers to several questions in another section. I recommend that you study these answers.

You can do a number of things on your own to heal a fragmented lifestream, including Mother Mary’s East-West Rosary, calls to the Violet Flame and other spiritual exercises. It will also be a great help to study both the teachings on this website and other books on spirituality and psychology. You can also find techniques for healing the soul or the inner child that can be helpful. Yet in the end it will be highly beneficial for people who have endured severe abuse to enter some form of therapy with a trained professional. Seek to find a therapist who is open to the spiritual side of life without going too far into some of the extremes you find in the New Age field. In other words, the key to manifesting Christhood is to attain balance and the key to healing your lifestream is to find a balanced form of therapy, which requires a balanced therapist.

I would also strongly recommend that you contemplate the possibility that your lifestream might have chosen to embody in a situation where there was a high probability of abuse. There are several reasons your lifestream might have made this choice. One is that your lifestream wanted to learn a specific lesson that would help you resolve something in your psychology. If this is the case, it is extremely important that you discover what that lesson is and fully integrate the lesson into your being. One potential reason is that your lifestream wanted to learn the lesson that it cannot rely on anything or anybody outside of itself but that it must go within and establish the contact to its Christ self.

Another reason for choosing a difficult childhood is that you are a mature lifestream who wants to help other lifestreams. You chose to do this by experiencing a very difficult situation yourself, so that you know what it feels like and can therefore be more effective in helping others overcome the negative effects of abuse.

Finally, your lifestream might have chosen a situation that could lead to abuse because you wanted to bring the judgment upon certain lifestreams that have committed abuses in the past. In that case, you should consider it your right and your obligation to call forth God’s judgment upon the lifestream, or lifestreams, who abused you and all the dark forces working through them. This is indeed one of the reasons I allowed myself to be crucified because in committing this abuse against a person with full Christhood, these lifestreams, and the forces working through them, brought about their own judgment. Although the very act of abuse is a judgment, it is still beneficial to call forth the judgment.

Another very important step is to work on enveloping the entire situation in the flame of forgiveness. Mother Mary’s Forgiveness Rosary is an extremely powerful tool for doing this. Her discourse on forgiveness is also extremely important because only when you can fully forgive those who abused you will you be able to leave the abuse behind.

It is also extremely important that you forgive yourself for your reaction to the abuse or anything you might have done as a result of the abuse. As a child, most people tend to think that the world revolves around them, meaning that if something bad happens to them, they must have done something to cause it. This makes many children accept a false sense of responsibility for the actions of the adults around them. In reality, the child was not responsible for the actions of the adults; the adults were acting out their own unresolved psychology, and they were likely influenced or controlled by dark forces as a result of those psychological weaknesses.

An unfortunate effect of the Christian doctrine about sin is that many children feel that if they were abused, they must have committed a sin that made them deserve this abuse, and this might mean that they are bad people. It is extremely important for you to completely overcome such negative feelings about yourself, and you can do so only by fully forgiving yourself, not so much for the abuse as for your reaction to the abuse or any actions, such as an attempt to dull the pain with alcohol or drugs, that followed the abuse.

Mother Mary’s discourse also explains how the dark forces try to trap you in a limited self image that makes you feel you could never again be worthy to come home to God. The most unfortunate effect of severe abuse is that a child can feel that it has been so violated by the abuse that it could never again be worthy to face God. As Mother Mary explains, this is the ultimate lie used by dark forces, and it is extremely important that you see through this lie, accept it as a lie and consciously choose not to believe in this lie. As Mother Mary says, there is nothing that could possibly have happened to you in this world that you cannot overcome and leave behind.

You talk about taking back dominion of your will and your I AM Presence. Let me first say that the Conscious You and soul vehicle never had dominion over your I AM Presence, and it is not meant to have such dominion. When your lifestream is connected to your I AM Presence, your Presence has dominion over your lifestream. That is why I said, “I of my own self (meaning the lifestream) can do nothing; it is the Father (meaning the I AM Presence) within me who is doing the work.” So you need to let your Presence take back dominion over your lifestream, and you do that by healing your lifestream and reestablishing the connection to your Christ self and through that to your I AM Presence.

I realize that when a lifestream has been deeply wounded, it can be very painful to think about the entire situation surrounding the abuse. It can therefore be very difficult for such a lifestream to realize and acknowledge the truth in Mother Mary’s teachings that nobody ever did anything to you. What she is really saying is that although someone abused you as a child, what caused your lifestream to be hurt was not the outer act of abuse but your reaction to it. This might be difficult to accept until you lifestream has been somewhat healed.

When your lifestream has been abused, it is almost inevitable that the lifestream will have fractured and that some of the fragments have become separated from your 4-fold vehicle. This leaves empty spaces within the structure of your soul vehicle, and those empty spaces can be filled in by impure energies or even by conscious beings that seek to control your lifestream.

Because there is not enough substance left after the abuse and because of outside forces manipulating your lifestream, it can feel as if your will was taken away from you. The reason being that the substance that is left might not be strong enough to take dominion over the structure of your lifestream. Yet as you begin to put on spiritual protection, and as you begin to heal your lifestream, you will magnetize some of the lost fragments back to you and you will expel the foreign energies and beings. This will then gradually build a critical mass, and you will eventually reach a point of greater wholeness where you can take back dominion over your conscious will.

However, I must make it clear that this is not an automatic process. The brutal fact is that no force in this world can take away your will. What can happen is that the forces of this world expose you to such severe trauma and abuse that your lifestream is in such turmoil that it can voluntarily give away its will. The lifestream can feel it has made such a severe mistake or that its situation is so chaotic that it could not possibly do anything on its own to resolve the situation. Therefore, the lifestream can voluntarily give up its will.

My point here is that as you begin the process of healing, there will come a point where you have magnetized enough fragments that you are able to take back your will. Yet taking back your will must be a conscious decision. You can take back your will only through an act of will. You gave it away through an act of will, and you must take it back the same way. There are serpentine lies designed to make you believe that if only you engage in a certain outer ritual, you will automatically be healed. The outer ritual of healing can indeed help you heal your lifestream. But in the end you must consciously take back your will by making the decision to accept full accountability for your own situation.

Please understand that I fully realize how difficult it can be for a person who has been severely abused, or who has been exposed to other forms of trauma, to feel any kind of personal responsibility for the situation. I am not asking you to feel accountable for what other people did to you. Nor am I asking you to feel that you must be a bad person to have such things happen to you. I am asking you to accept accountability for your reaction to the situation, so that you accept the fact that what hurt your lifestream was the decisions you made – the false self image you accepted – while the abuse was taking place or afterwards. I am then asking you to accept the fact that those decisions were the best possible decisions you could have made at the time, given your state of consciousness and spiritual maturity. This should be especially obvious concerning abuse that happened during childhood, but it truly applies to everyone.

I am then asking you to accept that because you have now reached a higher level of lifestream maturity, you could have made better decisions today than you made back then. When you come to this recognition, you can then allow yourself to re-experience the situation and replace the original decision with a better decision. I recognize that this can be painful, but if you go through the steps of healing your lifestream and establishing spiritual protection, the pain will be much less intense.

What I am saying is that in the end the damage that was done to your lifestream was done through decisions you made, and therefore the only way that damage can be permanently undone is by you making better decisions that replace the old choices. Once again, the help of an experienced therapist can be invaluable in terms of helping your lifestream go through the difficult process of facing its past decisions and replacing them with better ones.

I also realize it might take a long time to fully heal the effects of childhood abuse. Yet I can assure you that no matter what might have happened to you, it is possible to leave it all behind and manifest your personal Christhood. I can also promise you that by making the effort to seek healing, you will reap a reward that will make it all worth it. Once you are free from such past trauma, you will feel spiritually reborn, and you can then begin to express your Christhood and fulfill your divine plan.

Incidentally, your mission in life might be to help other victims of abuse and show them how to be healed. Or it might be to increase awareness about abuse and help society put an end to it—which must include a greater understanding of the spiritual causes of abuse.


Copyright © 2004 by Kim Michaels